You Got Straight A's; Now Go to Your Room!

If sending a child to his or her room without dinner after they've arrived home bearing a report card full of A's sounds like bad parenting, why does the act of punishing successful entrepreneurs sound so delectable?

Children who get straight A's work very hard. So do successful entrepreneurs.

Children who get straight A's use brainpower to achieve their goals. So do successful entrepreneurs.

To most conservatives, conservatism just feels right and liberalism feels wrong. One of the reasons we get a bad vibe when a Democrat speaks about raising taxes on the wealthy is because we feel it punishes success. And punishing success is wrong.

As the above argument can get a little stale, let me try to illustrate the problem that might occur if society were to begin punishing other successes.

Let's go back to the child with perfect marks in school. He or she is sent to their room without dinner and therefore stops reading books. In order to avoid further sanction they also fail to complete another homework assignment for the rest of their life. As a result of every child with determination being punished, those who even manage to graduate are ignorant. To fix the problem of children graduating without knowledge, we pour more money into the schools. Of course, because we no longer encourage children to strive for success, none of their predecessors have the know-how to create wealth and the government has no one to tax.

You see what happens when you punish noble behavior? And it's not as if only Republicans view hard work as virtuous.

"With the proper motivation anyone can achieve the American dream," President Obama says. "And when you do I will be standing proudly by your side (with my hand out). And once I get your money, I'll distribute it to those who just felt like 'chillin'' as you worked your butt off."

If we continue down the road of punishing good behavior, future conversations will go something like:

"Wow, I can't believe you pay so much for car insurance!"

"Everyone tried to tell me, 'Speed up, you're not going to hurt anyone!' but I wouldn't listen."

Call us conservatives crazy, but for some strange reason we don't believe a country can function where bad is good and good is bad.

But since Democrats control everything I might as well get used to it, therefore I am just kicking myself for the well articulated points I've made in this piece. I hereby curse my brilliant brain and adroit typing skills!

Curse the: brilliant brain and adroit typing skills!

I'm Just Looking for an Honest Place to Eat

I know a lot of you probably wonder why we conservatives have such a huge problem with taking what amounts to a few measly dollars from a rich person and giving it to a person of limited means.

Though America leads the world in good people; the majority of U.S. citizens are rotten.

Liberals want to give money to the least deserving of the rotten, i.e., the worst of the worst.

As long as people continue listening to Rush Limbaugh and other conservative talkers who promote moral self sufficiency, America will always have her share of those who take pride in their job and only desire to bring home money they earn.

And the people that listen to Rush don't want bailouts from the government. They simply want to keep the majority of money that they make, as well as retain the freedom that enables them to earn as much as possible. For these people, living within their means is a source of pride.

Under Obama's plan: plumbers, car salespersons, mechanics, contractors, etc. are people who will get money at the expense of brilliant men like Bill Gates who made our lives much easier with his invention of the computer operating system you likely use.

Sure, there are a few bad apples in the bunch, but the majority of wealthy business owners are in the mold of Dagny Taggart and Hank Reardon of Atlas Shrugged fame. They are noble. They are driven to success.

Of course many talented men and women work for wealthy entrepreneurs like Mr. Gates, and a good number of them make less than $250,000 a year - and therefore aren't considered "rich."

"Those people will also benefit from Obama's generosity," you say.

But those are the people who don't want the money, because they didn't earn it.

It's the people who either don't want to work, or attempt to cheat their fellow citizens during every job, that will take advantage of the "free money," provided by hard working wealthy individuals. I know President Obama talks as if it's his money, but it ain't.

It's not taking from the rich and giving to the poor; it's taking from the best and giving to the worst.

"I worked hard all day so you don't have to."

And if you think America is not full of rotten people, most of whom are liberal, just look at all the professions I mentioned earlier: car salespersons, contractors, mechanics, etc. These are people with whom we all hate to deal, because we're scared to death of being cheated or harassed. Should a person in one of these professions have a 50% success rate at performing a task, their clients would jump for joy.

You can't say, "People are inherently decent," when you have huge chunks that are known for spitting in the face of their fellow human beings.

Conservatives are overwhelmingly good.

Everyone else is either a crook, or possesses a job that doesn't allow them to cheat their fellow man as much as they'd like.

While hooked up to a lie detector test, ask mechanics why they chose their profession and I bet most wouldn't respond, "Because I love to work on cars." Rather I bet most would say, "Because I knew it meant I could cheat people who are ignorant about automobiles, thus earning money for work I did not accomplish."

If you think about it; that's what liberalism is all about: giving money to people who don't deserve it.

Let's pretend it wasn't well known that fried foods lead to weight gain.

"I'm looking for something healthy. Are you sure this is good for me," you would ask your waiter after receiving your meal.

"Oh yeah, that chicken fried steak sandwich slathered with mayonnaise and French fry combo plate has only five grams of fat and 20 calories," they would respond, not wanting to lose the sale.For most people; if they could get away with it, they would.

These are the people to whom President Obama wants to give money; money he took from hard working Americans who know right from wrong.